Zelensky’s UN Odyssey: From Hero to International Headache

Thread via Baron of the Tiaga

The UN/White House Ukraine summit was supposed to be a triumph for Biden’s policies. Russia should have been isolated and begging for peace, with Zelensky welcomed as a triumphant hero with tables full of cash. What went wrong? Let’s break it down

The first thing is, Ukraine failed. It had several months to make meaningful progress in Zaporozhye and justify the colossal investment so far in both training and machines. It could barely clear Rabotino. Sure, it got in some humiliating shots at Russia, but no game-changers.

Given the absolutely absurd hype (hello Hamish “Challengers will sweep Putin’s conscripts aside” de Bretton Gordon), the rest of the world was poised for meagre results, and they got them. As such, there was no isolation at the UN.

Not only did the global “rest” seem reinforced in their decision to remain on good terms with Moscow, some even saw fit to actively embarrass the west at the UN General Assembly. This included angry denunciations from 🇨🇴🇷🇸 and 🇬🇳 and leaving Olaf Scholz speaking to an empty room.

The media attempted to cast Zelensky as getting a warm reception, only for further embarrassment to ensue when footage showed him listening to his own speech in hastily spliced footage!

While this was going on, a delusional American volunteer in a bad wig was recording death threats against journalists, and popular conservative commentator Jack Posobiec was added to Ukraine’s notorious elimination list.

The resulting scandal led Ukraine’s Territorial Defense to announce they had fired the crazy man and placed him under investigation, after senators began asking who was paying his salary.

It’s not as if things were going well for American efforts to court India into their camp either, as staunch Biden ally and full-time douchebag Justin Trudeau decided to accuse Modi of sending assassins to Canada. He was deservedly rekt by Indian media.

But turning to the domestic front, surely things would be better. Biden might not be able to choreograph the UN, but congress should be a breeze to have Zelensky and Biden come out the summit smelling of roses… well no.

The only thing getting more attention than the scenes of pandemonium at the southern border were the bizarre antics of Senator John Fetterman, who could no longer be bothered to change into formal clothing and loafed about congress attracting more photos than Zelensky.

The other senators weren’t looking too great either. Mitch McConnell now requires a 24/7 chaperone, and Chuck Schumer has the leer of a Blackrock executive who just heard your country is having a firesale on state assets.

Senators Rand Paul and Mike Lee outright denounced Zelensky’s thuggish regime in no uncertain terms, and made the case to a sympathetic electorate that the former actor had had his chance, and not one penny more should be turned over.

A congressional petition to defund Zelensky attracted more signatures than one to supply him with ATACMS sponsored by human earthworm Tom Cotton and the ambiguously camp Lindsey Graham. In the House, McCarthy straight up blanked the Ukrainian delegation.

Biden must have known this wasn’t going well, but before he could even delve into “every mass shooting” he had visited (??), even worse news dropped.

The FBI had found mafia-style stacks of wadded bills and gold bars in the house of Ace Latino senator Bob Menendez.

As chair of the powerful Senate Foreign Relations Committee and a committed war hawk, it turned out Bob Corleone (and his wife) had been taking foreign bribes in exchange for voting through weapons deliveries to Egypt.

BUT, there was light at the end of the tunnel. The summit could still be salvaged by a big announcement from the Biden team. Finally, after Ukraine’s offensive forces were already devastated, ATACMS would be sent (mind you, only the cluster variant).

Well, this is what an NBC source had said… Over the next 24 hours, as Zelya swanned around Canada, the picture got a little more confusing, as two White House spokespeople denied that this had been decided, so now nobody knows what is happening.

In any case, the summit has been a failure, both for the neocon crusade worldwide, and for Biden’s domestic standing. Terrible optics, and the inability to just announce ATACMS with Zelensky standing next to Biden (how hard is this?!) is mindblowing comms incompetence.

(Addendum: in all this madness, who could forget that Zelensky was still forwarding a laughable international lawsuit against 🇵🇱🇸🇰🇭🇺, who he accused of working for Russia…The Poles threatened him, he insulted them at the UN, Morawiecki said “don’t talk to me or my wife’s son ever again”, and the whole controversy over cheap Ukrainian grain is still bubbling over. Hanna Malyar probably got out while the going was good tbh)