Who’s On First?

Who’s On First?

Abbott and Costello once delivered a comedy routine entitled, “Who’s on First?” that identified various players on a baseball team and the positions they fielded. My team is called America and these are my players. First Base. Who. Joe Biden is currently playing first...
Heaving in Geneva

Heaving in Geneva

Biden recently met with the president of Russia in Geneva, and America had a very good day. The entire world waited with bated breath to watch the main event of the summer; Vlad from Russia vs. Sleepy Joe from Wilmington. They looked like the odd couple. Barrel...
Trump’s Surprise Appearance at the MLB All-Star Game

Trump’s Surprise Appearance at the MLB All-Star Game

Major league baseball commissioner, Robert Manfred Junior, extended an offer to Texas Governor Greg Abbott to throw out the first pitch at the 2021 All-Star game in July. Governor Abbott replied that he “would rather jump into a tub full of warm vomit and shards of...
Please Help AOC’s Abuela

Please Help AOC’s Abuela

On September 20, 2017, Hurricane Maria ravaged Puerto Rico and dinged up AOC’s sweet abuela’s home. That storm occurred 1,353 days ago. AOC recently visited the island, surveyed grandma’s leaky roof and immediately blamed…wait for it…Donald Trump. This begs the...
I Didn’t Hear No Bell

I Didn’t Hear No Bell

I come from a very competitive family composed of 7 brothers and 3 sisters. Each of us loved to win, and it didn’t matter which game. We competed fiercely at Jungle Volleyball, Risk, Kick the Can, Monopoly, Roofball, Baseball, Basketball and Football. Winning at all...
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