Heard On A Palace Phone Line In Russia

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With the amount of surreptitious recording of everything we do and say, it is not surprising that a translated recording of a recent discussion has been made available for our enjoyment. Two world leaders discussing occurrences and strategies, crucial and mundane depending on perspective, . . .

Comrade Vladimir Putin

V.P. – “Hello? Hello? I thought you said you had him on the line. (He’s there Comrade Putin, he’s there.)”

V.J. – “Hello Mr. Putin, this is Valerie Jarrett, the President is here. We’re on speaker phone. Go ahead, we can hear you.”

V.P. – “Put him on the phone and take me off speaker.”

B.O. – “Hello, Vladimir. Sorry, I have a sore back. Twisted it on the golf course. Just finished a round. Who knew there were golf courses in the desert, and I think I . . .”

V.P. – “Look, I’m busy so I’ll make this brief. I’m in Crimea and I’m staying there. It’s always been part of Russia so don’t even think about it.”

B.O. – “What? Crimea? (Valerie, quick, where’s that? Oh.) So Vladimir, no problem, but please don’t make me look back in the press OK?”

V.P. – “Make you look bad? Aren’t you doing a good job of that all by yourself? You don’t need my help.”


B.O. – “Look, I’ve given you everything you wanted, I’ve cancelled the missile shield, I gave in on Syria, gave in on Iran, pulled Israel from striking Syria and Iran. I’ve approved Keystone, which maintains higher oil and gas prices to your advantage. I told you I’d be flexible, well I told what’s his name, your assistant, umm, Dmitry, yah, Dmitry. And I’ve been flexible.”

V.P. – “Just don’t get fancy with any real sanctions. You don’t want to make me angry. Ask Merkel what happens if I’m angry. She understands very well, or ask the Ukrainians. Oh, and I hold some of your debt, maybe you’re not aware of that. Do you have any idea what I can do to retaliate if you do anything to make ME look bad? Keep blowing hundreds of millions selling your Obamacare to Americans, and stay out of my business.

B.O. – “But you won’t go into any other areas of Ukraine, will you?”

V.P. – “I protect Russians and Russian interests. Don’t interfere.”

B.O. – “What about some of these other countries like Georgia, or Belarus, or (what did you say Valerie?) . . . or Finland?”

V.P. – “I don’t understand what you’re saying. We’re friends with those countries and we trade with them. That’s it. Nothing else.”

B.O. – “So you are not invading anyone else?”

V.P. – “What did you say to me? Invading? I’m not invading anything. I’m protecting what is Russia’s. I will always protect what is Russia’s.”

B.O. – “Oh, good. OK, so we’re good then. Umm, I should get my guy to meet with your guy, that way it looks like we’re doing something positive.”

V.P. – “What?”

B.O. – “Right now, you’re not making me look very good. That whole Iran and Syria thing really hurt me in the polls, and . . . . ”

V.P. – “I didn’t call to talk about Iran.”

B.O. – “I need to look like I’m doing something. I need to tell those Americans something. I’m President. They’re not the sharpest people, and they’ll believe what I tell them, but I need some help here particularly on the international stage. I have big plans for after I leave office.”

V.P. – “I don’t care what you tell them, or what you do, just don’t impose sanctions. None.”

B.O. – “So is it OK if Valerie sets up a meeting with John and . . . ”

V.P. – “I’m too busy for this.” . . . click.

A fading empire run by a thug is dictating international policy across Europe and throughout the Middle East. The implementation of Putin’s sweeping nationalist agenda will accelerate through to the end of the Obama Administration’s tenure in the Oval Office. Putin may not be brilliant, but his background and his actions tell us he knows how to exploit weakness.

The pandering MSM has completely accepted the new reality that has been imposed on Crimea and the Ukraine. We can look forward to other new realities as Putin the Strongman rebuilds the Russia of Tsarist days. Nicholas II, Emperor of Russia and Grand Duke of Finland, will be proud.

A constituent of the vast baby boomer generation with a career which has been fortunate to know the ponderous corporate worlds, as well as the intimately pressurized, and invigorating entrepreneurial domains of high tech and venture capital, I have harvested my share of mistakes meandering through corridors of enterprise from Silicon Valley, to London and endless, colourful, sometimes praetorian points in between. The voyage has provided an abundance of fodder for a pen yielding to an inquisitive keyboard, a foraging mind, and a passionate spirit. Whether political or business or social or economic or personal, is it not all political? It is a privilege to write, and an even greater privilege to be read by anyone, and sometimes with the wind at my back the writing may occasionally be legible. I do not write to invite scorn, nor to invite respect, but if I get really lucky the writing can stimulate thinking. I also write for the very selfish purpose of animating my own processes, and engaging the best of what life offers. Above all, whether biting fire or swatting shadows, I am grateful to be gifted the freedom to write and publish whatever flows down to the keyboard. To all those who enabled this freedom, and to all those standing guard to preserve it, I am indebted.

24 Responses to “Heard On A Palace Phone Line In Russia”

  1. 1



    Look, we may not have a decisive statesman in the White House, but he is cool and he knows how to play to the crowd, and we have never had a president who could get women to faint on cue. Instead of focusing on Obama’s weaknesses and failures, we need to applaud his strengths and accomplishments, as soon as someone figures out what they are.

  2. 2

    James Raider


    @Skook: #1,
    LOL, . . . ssshhh, he doesn’t know either. He’s waiting for Jarrett and Holder to tell him, but they’re too preocupied with telling him he’s one of the world wonders. Jarrett is one sick puppy. When you read her incomprehensible and over-the-top stroking of his ego, you just know she hates his guts. Narcissists have no friends, and she’s no friend of his. I’ll go out on a limb, . . . well, not much of one, and say that she has used him from day one and probably envies the adulation SHE believes she has created for him. It pisses her off that he actually believes his own press — the press she creates and manipulates.

    Meanwhile, we can look forward to hearing about new Putin owned hotels and casinos rising from the dirt in Crimea. Finland here he comes.

  3. 3


    Russia has real soldiers on their border and no gay pride marches in their army…

    Imagine that.

    Who is defending the borders of the United States?

    Russia has a 13% flat tax and no capital gains tax.

    Who are the communists again, comrades?

    Forcing everyone to buy Obamacare or Romneycare from the Wall Street insurance companies owned by the big banks makes no sense at all…

    “Occupy” exactly what?

  4. 4


    @James Raider:

    “Perhaps he is wondering why you would shoot a man before throwing him out of a plane.”

    Jesuits and the Vatican… Hitlery Clinton’s Presidential Campaign-Latin America Working Group…

    Zbigniew Brzezinski… Institute on Communist [Anti-Russia] Affairs, 1960 to 1989… Obama at Columbia with Brzezinski… never seen on campus, student transcripts are sealed…

    Sodom Hussein Obama visits Jesuit Pope… secret input, NSA computer system and network…
    Vatican banking scandal, secret accounts, audited… purged of evidence… the angel is burned… Thuban… Draco… Khufu…

    “Nobody cared about who I was until I put on the mask.”

  5. 5


    @Skook: #1

    Look, we may not have a decisive statesman in the White House, but he is cool and he knows how to play to the crowd….

    He doesn’t know how to, “…play to the crowd….” without his TOTUS. He only knows how to READ to the crowd. Someone else writes the PLAY for him.

    Instead of focusing on Obama’s weaknesses and failures, we need to applaud his strengths and accomplishments, as soon as someone figures out what they are.

    ALL OF OUR ENEMIES know what obama’s strengths are, and ALL OF THEM are all directed at bringing the USA down. North Korea even fired rockets into the South Korean part of the sea, and they know obama won’t do anything about it.

  6. 6

    Bill Burris

    So, since ancient Israel (Canaan) once consisted of the “occupied” lands of Golan and Gaza (and more), Israel has a perfect right to take those lands and absorb them?

  7. 8


    James Raider – I read this whole conversation and thought it was a spoof ? Am I being naive to think otherwise? Because if it isn’t, then -> WOW!

  8. 9

    James Raider

    @FAITH7: #8,
    You’re right, it’s a spoof attempting to portray what is going on based as closely as possible on the personalities involved and my opinion — Jarrett the current power in the U.S. Administration who insinuates herself into EVERYTHING, Putin the neighborhood KGB thug, and of course Obama who is too narcissistic to care about anything or anyone other than how it feeds his ego.

    – Putin has proven that he’ll eliminate anyone who oposes him.
    – Jarrett has used the W.H. power and money to implement her agenda which includes retribution on opponents.
    – Obama’s uninquisitive mind is dreaming of the day when, standing on the monolith of his Nobel Peace Prize, he is given a newly created position by the UN as Global Grand Master of Hope and Change — signifying nothing, meaning nothing. In the meantime, world leaders who use the U.S. as a foil, seem RWA to act as they please, from Moscow, to Teheran, to North Korea, to Syria, to . . . etc.

  9. 10


    @James Raider: #9

    …standing on the monolith of his Nobel Peace Prize….

    Do you mean the prize he got after being in office less than two weeks?

    The deadline for nomination for this year’s Nobel Peace Prize was February 1, 2009. This is less than two weeks into his term as President!


    One article said he evidently didn’t win it for what he did, but for what he said he will do. Remember how he said he was going to reduce the nuclear weapons around the world by reducing ours, and other countries would be EMBARRASSED, and reduce theirs. I had never thought of using EMBARRASSMENT to get others to do what you want them to. What a brilliant idea! Russia, China, and North Korea must be really EMBARRASSED by now. It won’t be long before they de-nuke.

  10. 11

    James Raider

    @Smorgasbord: #10,

    Do you mean the prize he got after being in office less than two weeks?

    The whole thing was a very strange set-up by Jarrett and her gang. It made no sense. The Europeans looked like dunces, and Obama looked absolutely pathetic when he “accepted” it. But then, he’s not the sharpest of the Jarrett bunch. It was an embarassment which made him look ridiculous, and made America look foolish for having elected someone it knew nothing about. It’s almost as if that prize cemented the “this is an April fools” joke in international consciousness.

    . . . . And that was the beginning of America’s slide in reputation.

  11. 13

    James Raider

    @Kraken: #12
    This may turn out to be more prescient than currently thought. Hollywood may may well create an Oscar category just taylor made for the Hollow narcissist-in-chief.

  12. 14


    @James Raider: #11
    al gore got (not won) one, obama got one, Putin could be nominated for one. Someone made a FOR SALE sign, and it was for the nobel prizes. When you think of all of the people who have worked for many years in the different fields, then they find out that the prizes are now auctioned off to the highest bidder. Think how they feel. I wonder what gore and obama had to bid for theirs. Some day the prizes might be sold on eBay.

  13. 17

    Nanny G

    I can understand Obama ”pivoting” away from his failures, but why is the media so quiet about Ukraine right now?
    Putin has raised the cost of energy to Ukraine causing that country to burn through its currency very fast.
    (Don’t forget the old Ukrainian leader, the Putin puppet, took over $80 billion in Ukraine’s federal monies.)’
    Putin’s blackmail is worth coverage yet crickets.

  14. 19

    James Raider

    @Nanny G: #17,
    With all that is going on, including unemployment being through the roof, ObieCare’s disaster, Iran going nuclear, Crimea’s invasion, etc., the geniuses at CNN and the rest of the MSM are covering the Malaysian plane disappearance 24/7. They’ve exhausted all sources so you’ll now find 20 year olds being questioned on it by CNN’s hope for recovery Anderson Cooper.

    But fear not, Obie spiked the football on ObieCare sign-ups yesterday making sure that the last few who still believe anything he utters, swallow more toxic waste.

  15. 20


    James Raider

  16. 21

    James Raider

    @ilovebeeswarzone: #20
    Hey, MsBees, . . . well in my mind they said all that. On one end a tough guy with an agenda, and on the other, a narcissistic wimp who can’t do anything unless HIS handler Jarrett tells him what to do. All of it is self-servingly political and nothing else.

  17. 23


    @Nanny G: #17

    but why is the media so quiet about Ukraine right now?

    Fox News is reporting on it, but the propaganda machine for the democrats are only going to say what will help get democrats elected. That is their job now.

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