Attention, journalists of America: Time is running out! You have under three weeks left to publish your last batch of over-the-top pre-election puff pieces on Texas Democrat/cross-country liberal sensation/wing-and-a-prayer Senate candidate Beto O’Rourke!
It is here that we must face the difficult truth: Barring a GOP-related disaster of some sort, O’Rourke — he of that ineffable “cool factor” and “special sauce,” at least according to easily impressed columnists at the Washington Post — is likely to lose big. According to the latest polls, Senator Ted Cruz leads him by anywhere between seven and nine points. Tuesday’s debate between the two, meanwhile, was so mismatched that O’Rourke’s best moment might have involved a random deer-in-the-headlights story in which he described how he “got to meet this blind squirrel who is slowly regaining its sight.”
In summary, this year’s Betomania — a somewhat weird phenomenon, as we’ll explore in a bit — seems set to disappear from view just as quickly as it arrived, at least in the Lone Star State. On one hand, this possibility warms my heart, given that in my neck of Texas, it has grown rather exasperating to have to wade through 15,000 blaring BETO yard signs when I’m simply trying to get a breakfast taco or four. On the other hand, I also feel a tinge of melancholy and regret about all of this, given that I never got my act together enough to print ironic t-shirts with the following brilliant slogan I made up all by myself: “You BETO vote for Ted Cruz.”
Anyway, back to the matter at hand. I’d like to further discuss the debate between O’Rourke and Ted Cruz, and also actual policy issues, and also perhaps the fact that many people in politics seem to be slowly going insane. But first, can we talk about how embarrassing Betomania is? Friends, I am deeply concerned for our culture. When you look at a middle-aged establishment politician as an icon of “rock star” cool, you’re doing something wrong.
“Skateboarding Beto O’Rourke Shreds Whataburger Parking Lot,” read an actual recent headline on the website of the Dallas Morning News. This all sounds really rad and sick and gnarly and whatever until you actually watch the video, which features O’Rourke gently coasting around the parking lot, soccer-dad style, looking precariously close to biting the dust when he gives a bystander a high five. Don’t get mad: I’m not judging! I would do exactly the same thing, except I’d probably actually fall! But no wide-eyed journalist would write a headline claiming that I “shredded” anything, nor credulously act like I belonged on the cover of Thrasher magazine.
Of the countless head-scratching elements of the O’Rourke phenomenon, one wins handily as the head-scratchingest of all: A troubling percentage of the Betomaniacs I have met in Texas moved here after fleeing places ruined by Beto’s favored policies. These locales are often expensive, increasingly dysfunctional, wildly overregulated, sometimes mystifyingly poop-ridden despite being wildly overregulated (here’s looking at you, San Francisco!), and inevitably run by Democrats. Why does no one seem to make this connection? I don’t know! One hero in Austin has taken to posting stickers around town featuring an image of a giant locust, paired with the following text: “I MIGRATED TO A THRIVING TEXAS FROM A LEFTIST [NIGHTMARE] AND NOW I’M VOTING FOR BETO FOR SENATE.” (The posters feature a word much worse than “nightmare,” which I’m not reprinting because I run a PG-13 column here.)
“But Heather,” you might be thinking. “Surely you must have seen the countless articles in national publications describing how annoying Ted Cruz is and how Beto O’Rourke is going to lead our generation in rising up above the terrible cynicism that dominates modern politics, acting as a bridge uniting and respecting the diverse voices of Texans as long as you join in lockstep support for things like abortion on demand, higher taxes, and a list of leftist hobbyhorses that drive out-of-state donors wild!”
Why yes, thanks, I have read those articles. I laugh every time!
Pres Trump promised Sen Ted Cruz he’d get as big an arena as Cruz could get for tonight’s rally (will be live on CSPAN).
At first they had an 8,000 seat one in Dallas.
But that was WAY too small.
So, they got the biggest Texas has, an 18,000 seat arena in Houstin.
I guess all those folks in Dallas will have to dive or watch on overflow big screens in the Dallas or Houstin arenas.
That’s going to be several big crowds.
What’s this Robert O’Rourke going to do to match it?
Call himself “Beto” and skatboard somewhere?
Beto will be crying in his Whataburger shake while I am in Houston at the Trump rally. Poor, poor Beto.
Liberals loves them some gimmicks. Windy Wendy Child-Abandoner Davis talked and talked and talked in support of late term abortions and against abortion regulation, so she became the gimmick de jour to run for Governor of Texas. Being incompetent, she lost, of course. Now, they have a Irish ex-con that they think is going to “turn Texas blue” be defeating Cruz (who happens to REALLY be Hispanic).
Characteristic of his campaign is his describing Cruz’s opposition to the ruinous Obamacare as being upset because “people had too much health care”. Obamacare left citizens with NO health care… only the payments. They had deductibles the prohibited ever dreaming of actually using health care.
The Dallas Morning News is a major liberal cheerleader for O’Rourke. They relentlessly and without shame advertise O’Rourke as America’s salvation; saving us from better jobs, a growing economy, securing the border, protecting citizens criminal illegal immigrants and repairing the damage left from Obamacare.
There are a lot of “Beto” signs… in no small part because many of the Cruz signs are being stolen. Remember, this is the campaign supporters that sent the envelope of white powder simulating a dangerous hazardous substance to Cruz’s headquarters.
Thankfully, O’Rourke is beginning to fall back in the polls (despite heavy out of state and Soros support), but complacency is a sickness. We have to keep up the pressure and defeat liberals wherever they may be.
I notice Ted Cruz dodged the CNN sponsored Texas Town Hall meeting with O’Rourke tonight. At least somebody wasn’t afraid to answer questions from the public. Cruz, meanwhile, is relying on riding on the coattails of the man who insulted his wife. That must have been a bitter pill to swallow. Maybe increasing the odds of victory is worth kissing the Donald’s ring—or whatever.
i’d certainly rather watch a real entertainer like Willie Nelson than a stand up comic like The Donald.
Trump insulted his wife and his father as well as calling him a liar–how does he live with that? Cruz has none of the qualities that has made Texas great–basically a coward.
What did Trump say about Heidi?
He wrote: a picture is worth a thousand words.
To that he pinned a REtweet of somebody else’s tweeted photo of a side-by-side of Melania and Heidi.
Robert O’Rourke pretends to be Hispanic by calling himself “Beto” and speaking Spanish.
He had the gall to call 100% Cuban (therefore 100% Hispanic) Ted Cruz a “Canadian” simply because that’s where his parents were when he was born and they were escaping Castro.
Robert has no shame.
He lied about not taking PAC money.
He lied about El Paso never having a US Senator’s office open in it.
He dishonestly did a 180′ switcheroo on eminent domain…..he wanted to take private properties for his own real estate project (not a road, school or hospital) but a petition went around and he saw he was losing badly so he switched to oppose ED.
It’s really hard to have a debate (and Cruz is an excellent debater) with someone so dishonest.
I don’t blame Cruz for skipping this one.
@Greg: It was CNN not exactly huge coverage. I watched the debate the Irish guy couldnt answer a question strait forward to save his election. He is a real peach open borders, wants the fence on the border of El Paso removed complete MORON https://www.elpasotimes.com/story/news/local/juarez/2018/07/16/u-s-issues-security-alert-juarez-due-violence-mexico-border-city/785728002/
@richard wheeler:You really need to get over yourself. If those two men can bury the hatchet and liberals cant get over the election who has a bigger mental illness?
@kitt:’get over myself’ lol
Trump buried a hatched into Cruz’s soft middle–Cruz backed down–now he skips debate. Texan’s should be ashamed to be represented by such a softie—he seems more Canadian than Texan.
He should. CNN would be on O’ROOK’s team, skewing the questions, aiding O’Rook and trying to determine the outcome. CNN has totally destroyed their own credibility.
What’s to fear when the media will cover up all your flubs and flaws?
Obama called Hillary a racist that would say anything for a vote (i.e., LIE), then turned around and called her the “most qualified candidate in history”. How do you square that? Oh… that’s right. When you KNOW they are corrupt liars, it comes as no shock or surprise when they lie.
So now you’re an expert on what makes a Texan? What a joke. What a liberal, Loonafornia leftist like yourself knows about Texans could be put in the eye of a gnat.
@richard wheeler: It was not a debate I watched the debate, it was a town hall we saw what CNN calls a town hall, Cruz was clever enough to avoid the stacked audience of the resistance. You can actually stream the real debate, Beto was crushed. Im sure Beto was given all the questions in advance for the CNN appearance.
Should maybe know what you are talking about debate, town hall, liberal lynch mob
No doubt a quick comparison with Donald Trump was enough to put both factors into an entirely different light.
@Greg: No, Hillary is still a racist that lies on a regular basis. But, then again, so is Obama. Plus, Hillary is a corrupt criminal. So, we were blessed to have a Trump victory of the lying corruption of Hillary and to have to major benefits of his leadership.
Repubs. shouldn’t fear the MSM. They can run straight to Fox., day or night, and get out the truth. No lies or fake news from Hannity, Laura or Tucker—just straight out news according to Trump.
The House turns over in 18 days
@Richard Wheeler: How about ignore them all cut the cable cord, get news from WSJ or the Federalist, Washington times Drudge report, with out the flashing images repeating propaganda every 15 minutes the scrolling at the bottom. It was the cable outlets that named themselves enemies of the people and Fake news. Trump said the Fake news was the enemy of the People it was they who took offense, Only CNN he did call fake news directly it was that outlet that hires ex CIA agents and gave Hillary the questions in advance for the Debate. MSLSD editing the koi feeding just to be petty piss pants. With reporting like that how can you trust anything they say?
@kitt: Exactly—Trump—our liar in chief—calls something fake news and his lemmings take it to the bank. Tell me–how stOOpid is that? Has he ever called out Fox? Of course not. He’s got a man crush on Hannity.
Agree with you on WSJ—As good as it gets–in all areas.
Whoa, Bubba. I thought you liked liars in chief, you know like “If you like your health care you can keep it, if you like your doctor you can keep them” and “I did not have sex with that woman, Ms. Lewinski”? Lies, blatant lies, coming from the left doesn’t seem to bother you.
Of course, your party has nothing to run on except Medicaid For All, decreasing the benefits of seniors who paid into the Medicare system their entire working lives to give Medicaid to those who didn’t; protests, sometimes violent, by the far left wing Socialists of your party, dismissing jurisprudence standards of innocent until proven guilty, open borders, et al. I bet it makes you feel all fuzzy inside to know that Maxine Waters will head up the Financial committee and that brain numbing stupid woman, Nancy Pelosi, will be Speaker.
Your party has come a long way since JFK. All in the wrong direction.
@Richard Wheeler: You need to READ the news from a variety of sources, is what I am saying, stop getting programmed by the cable shows that are using studied mind control techniques. Look for sources that use inflammatory language minimally, answer all the who, what, where, when in articles, un-named sources should not be accepted as fact.
Read the articles and then watch the cable news and to see if they are doing any of this.
I cut the cord 2 years ago, saving loads $$$.
@kitt: These liberals FEAR being informed. It’s why they scurry in fear from answering a question; it exposes them to having to think about what they are supporting and wonder WHY. They can’t face that and they can’t face the fact that the liberal media thinks they are all idiots.