Posted by Larry Brandes on 9 September, 2021 at 8:19 am. 17 comments already!


If I were declared King of the United States, for one day, I would sit on the throne and issue the following, irrevocable edict. Four of the swiftest horses in the kingdom (Twitter, email, texting, and Facebook) would spread my proclamation throughout the land.

1. Term Limits would be required for all members of the Senate and House of Representatives.

I am tired of dinosaurs getting elected and then staying in perpetuity. Nancy Pelosi (80) Maxine Waters (82) and Diane Feinstein (88) come to mind. The U.S. Senate and the U.S. House of Representatives have morphed into expensive geriatric wards. Seriously, some of our politicians would have trouble pasting popsicle sticks together. What do you think? Maybe it’s time for a change. Two terms max. It’s a great idea whose time has come.

Heaven forbid, what will legislators do once out of office? Who has two thumbs and doesn’t care? That would be me, Larry B.

2. Males and females from the ages of 18 to 20 would be conscripted to provide service to our country.

Look, I enlisted in the U.S. Army for two years in 1968. It was an interesting learning experience and I was proud to serve my country. Conscripts may choose to serve in the Marines, Army, Navy, Air Force, Space Force, or Coast Guard. That would be wonderful. However, some may not choose to serve in the armed forces, which is just fine and dandy. They would have the option of serving in the Peace Corps, volunteer in hospitals or food pantries located throughout the country. They could also serve on one of the three hospital ships I have listed in my third decree. How about the entitled, rich son/daughter of a Senator? Will he/she have to serve? You bet your sweet bippee and not for daddy or mommy. Rich kids and poor kids will serve side by side. Anyone who flees the country to avoid this decree will automatically surrender his/her passport. When he/she want to return to the United States (and they will), they will still be required to serve two years. Let us call it tough love.

3. U.S. Hospital Ships will roam the world.

These ships, USNS Faith, USNS Hope, and USNS Charity will sail the seven seas and assist countries who request help. Our “volunteers” will be America’s ambassadors, provide valuable assistance cleaning up disasters and help people survive and thrive. Emergency supplies will be provided free of cost. Nothing from these countries will be expected in return. No quid pro quo. NADA. Our prime directive will be to help those less fortunate.

4. Solve the COVID Pandemic. No, I’m serious. Quit dorking around and find a solution for this virus that has been ravaging the globe. Presently, ugly politics and the lure of money are driving scientists insane, underground, and into unethical behavior. Scientists are amazing, intelligent, and have massive computers at their disposal. However, their message is completely muddled. Muddled like who’s on first and what’s on second and I don’t have a clue if anyone is even playing third base. Leading scientists from across the globe need to prioritize finding a solution to the coronavirus pandemic.

5. Restore Donald Trump as President of the United States. One very positive outcome from the Biden presidency is to illustrate the difference between a great president who loves this country (TRUMP) and a befuddled, confused, and mentally challenged (BIDEN). In a recent poll, Biden’s approval rating dropped to 39%. Ouch. You can find Joe at either the White House or Wilmington. If no one answers the door, try the local Dairy Queen.

6. Voters must show a valid, picture ID for their ballot to count. No picture ID…no vote. That is so simple that even a caveman could understand.

7. Finish building the southern border.

This isn’t rocket science. A country without a border is …wait for it…not a country. Thoroughly vet all illegal immigrants who entered the country. First, you have to find them because they are stashed/hidden all over the country. Wasn’t that sneaky?

That’s my abbreviated list and I’m sure that you can think of many others. Being the King of the United States is hard. Who was the genius who constructed my throne out of sharp metal shards?

I think I’ll go take a nap and when I wake we should talk about the morons in DC spending money like drunken sailors on shore leave. Our national debt is approaching 29 Trillion dollars. “Houston, we have a problem!”

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