Osama bin Laden: MoveOn. Org, Daily Kos and The New Republic Subscriber?

Or did his speech writer just graduate from an American liberal arts university?

Osama sent the American people an anniversary gift to mark the sixth anniversary of the September 11th attacks. I didn’t know that the proper gift for a sixth anniversary of a terrorist atrocity was a gasbag of a rehashed Marxist America-hating speech, but I’ll keep that in mind for next time.

If you haven’t had the opportunity to read the speech in full you should. It’s here in a clear, copyable pdf from the SITE Intelligence Group.

Titled "The Solution" it reads more like the ravings of former professor Ward Churchill, or any other America hating loon you might see at one of the small anti-war protests that pop up from time to time.

The speech credits Noam Chomsky, one of the lefties favorite self-loathing, America hating intellectuals for inspiration. That in itself is surprising. You wouldn’t think that Chomsky’s work undermining the United States would get great play in the caves of Waziristan.

This address, differs markedly from previous efforts in both style and substance. The old demand that the U.S. totally withdraw from "Muslim Lands" (meaning anywhere Muslims live, presumably including Dearborn, Michigan) is gone. The followers of hopeless presidential candidate Ron Paul, who demand we "listen" to our enemies will be relieved they are no longer duty bound to obey and abandon all our allies around the world.

While previous speeches referred to stealing the oil wealth of Muslim nations (at $70 a barrel?) this speech makes one brief reference to a curious variation of the lefty chant "no blood for oil" saying: ""no to spilling red blood for black oil."

But what drives this speech, and is truly mystifying from an Islamist perspective is the constant refrain about evil American corporations.

Here’s a montage:

Osama: "The life of all of mankind is in danger because of the global warming resulting to a large degree from the emissions of the factories of the major corporations, yet despite that, the representative of these corporations in the White House insists on not observing the Kyoto accord.

"The democratic system, which confirms its massive failure to protect humans and their interests from the greed and avarice of the major corporations and their representatives."

"The capitalist system seeks to turn the entire world into a fiefdom of the major corporations under the label of “globalization.”"

"Warmongering owners of the major corporations realize that you have lost confidence in your democratic system."

"It has now become clear to you and the entire world the impotence of the democratic system and how it plays with the interests of the peoples and their blood by sacrificing soldiers and populations to achieve the interests of the major corporations."

Gee whiz! It’s like that episode of South Park with the Hippie Jam Fest!

There’s only one thing a hippie Osama hates worse than corporations and that’s neocons.

"And among the most important items contained in Bush’s speeches since the events of the 11th is that the Americans have no option but to continue the war. This tone is in fact an echoing of the words of neoconservatives like Cheney, Rumsfeld (pictured right with Gerald Ford) and Richard Pearle."

But when the neocons get together with the evil corporations, WATCH OUT!

"In the Vietnam War, the leaders of the White House claimed at the time that it was a necessary and crucial war, and during it, Rumsfeld and his aides murdered two million villagers. And when Kennedy took over the presidency and deviated from the general line of policy drawn up for the White House and wanted to stop this unjust war, that angered the owners of the major corporations who were benefiting from its continuation.

And so Kennedy was killed, and al-Qaida wasn’t present at that time, but rather, those corporations were the primary beneficiary from his killing. And the war continued after that for approximately one decade. But after it became clear to you that it was an unjust and unnecessary war, you made one of your greatest mistakes, in that you neither brought to account nor punished those who waged this war, not even the most violent of its murderers, Rumsfeld."

Let’s see now, Donald Rumsfeld first became Secretary of Defense in 1975. John F. Kennedy had been dead for nearly 12 years. Pretty neat trick for Rumsfeld the neocon to mastermind that while murdering two million Vietnamese especially since most U.S. forces had already left Vietnam by the time he became Defense Secretary.

Ah, but don’t let a little thing like history or facts get in the way of a jihadi/Marxist rant.

Like many on the left, Osama also had some choice words for Democrats. Obviously, he was disappointed they haven’t been able to assure surrender and he had to renew the lease on his cave instead of pack up for one of Saddam’s palaces:

"People of America: the world is following your news in regards to your invasion of Iraq, for people have recently come to know that, after several years of the tragedies of this war, the vast majority of you want it stopped. Thus, you elected the Democratic Party for this purpose, but the Democrats haven’t made a move worth mentioning. On the contrary, they continue to agree to the spending of tens of billions to continue the killing and war there, which has led to the vast majority of you being afflicted with disappointment.
…
So in answer to the question about the causes of the Democrats’ failure to stop the war, I say: they are the same reasons which led to the failure of former president Kennedy to stop the Vietnam war. Those with real power and influence are those with the most capital. And since the democratic system permits major corporations to back candidates, be they presidential or congressional, there shouldn’t be any cause for astonishment - and there isn’t any- in the Democrats’ failure to stop the war. And you’re the ones who have the saying which goes, "Money talks." And I tell you: after the failure of your representatives in the Democratic Party to implement your desire to stop the war, you can still carry anti-war placards and spread out in the streets of major cities, then go back to your homes, but that will be of no use and will lead to the prolonging of the war."

Like any good Marxist, Osama is down on the whole concept of democracy:

"And among the things which catch the eye of the one who considers the repercussions of your unjust war against Iraq is the failure of your democratic system, despite it raising of the slogans of justice, liberty, equality and humanitarianism. It has not only failed to achieve these things, it has actually destroyed these and other concepts with its weapons.
…
So it is imperative that you free yourselves from all of that and search for an alternative, upright methodology in which it is not the business of any class of humanity to lay down its own laws to its own advantage at the expense of the other classes as is the case with you, since the essence of man-made positive laws is that they serve the interests of those with the capital and thus make the rich richer and the poor poorer."

"The rich richer and the poor poorer?" Osama is a Democrat after all. The only thing he missed is "tax cuts for the rich." Maybe next time.

But what is that "alternative, upright methodology" which will free us from our evil ways?

You guessed it. Covert to Islam:

"To conclude, I invite you to embrace Islam, for the greatest mistake one can make in this world and one which is uncorrectable is to die while not surrendering to Allah, the Most High, in all aspects of one’s life - ie., to die outside of Islam. And Islam means gain for you in this first life and the next, final life. The true religion is a mercy for people in their lives, filling their hearts with serenity and calm."

Ah yes, the religion of peace, the hearts of whose adherents are filled with "serenity and calm" like Rage Boy here.

There’s so much more to this speech for America haters to admire and no doubt Osama’s speech will be required reading for college freshman in humanities courses at public universities where America hating lefties monopolize the trough of taxpayer supported education.

But this speech is such badly written tripe, it’s likely to set off a new revolution in comedy writing. Just make sure you don’t use any images of the prophet when you do.

They can pair the speech up with that other approved teaching aid, the comic book for San Francisco schools written by America haters which seems to have been the source material for the speech.